Burning Man 2015 - Reflections from a Veteran

Ticket sales for Burning Man 2016 are imminent.  This will be my third burn and it reminded me to share my experience from this past year, my first year as a Burning Man veteran.

Better? Worse?

Different.

Inevitably, some of the magic is gone.

Nothing will ever match the curiosity and wonder as you explore the camps for the first time, the dust rising in spirals around you, coating your body in protective layers.

 

 

Nothing will ever match your first dark ride into the deep playa's arms, greedy to steal you away from your friends with promises of disruptive lights, throbbing sound and whimsical character.

 

 

 

 

 

And nothing will ever match your first sunrise, the pink rays spreading warmth across the sky to the sweet pop of breakfast champagne and the gentle pulse of Robot Heart.

But with veteranhood comes new magic.

The magic of returning Home.  The relief, the anticipation, the thrill.  For those of you who haven't experienced it....It's the bursting happiness of seeing a loved one for the first time in months. It's the chilling anticipation down your spine of the festival bass greeting you before you even enter the show grounds. It's the heady ache deep in your stomach from a first kiss.

This swirl of old emotions only intensifies as you reunite with your burner family.  It's been a year since you saw them last.  You are reminded that for all texts and emails and phone calls throughout the year, nothing replaces the physical force of a well-aimed hug.  These people have seen into your soul and made a home there.

And the original magic isn't completely lost because you share in it with the new Virgins you've brought along.  Like a proud parent, you revel in their innocence.  You send them off alone on their first art car ride. You show them the wonder of the Man and the Temple.  You share champagne for their first sunrise.  And you welcome them into your family of gypsies eager to share with these newcomers.  You want them to know everything you have known and discover new things you haven't.

 

And therein lies the final magic of Burning Man.  Each year, Burning Man reinvents itself.  In some ways I felt at home and in some ways I was a stranger.  It's like returning to a place where the streets are the same but the sights and the people are different.  You get to fall in love with this place all over again.

But it wasn't all magic.  The cracks have begun to show.  Not just in the hard-baked earth, but in the essence of the event.

There was more garbage.
There was more mainstream music. 
There were more people who had come just to drug up and party.

During Major Lazer this past year, I had a moment of intense anger.  I looked the show and realized I was surrounded by zombies with no respect for human space and decency.  And the generic music? I could've gone to Brochella.  I jumped on my bike and cruised to the opposite end of the playa where I found a handful of people kicking up dust to some weird ass DJ. Phew! Escape.

But that's just one girl's opinion.  I respect the tenants of Burning Man that it is a place for everyone even if "everyone" is not for me.

It wasn't my place to judge these people, but I could choose not to coexist with them so I removed myself.  Luckily for me, Burning Man is large enough that there are still places to escape. I worry that those places will eventually cease to exist.  It's a cautionary tale.  I know my burns are numbered because of it.

But in the meantime I will be returning to the Playa this year to soak in the magic that is still left.

If you are coming to Burning Man for the first time this year ignore what everyone else tells you.  Ignore everything I've just said.  Form your own opinion.  That's the whole fucking point.

And if you see a purple dragon clapping her hands at sunrise you'll know it's me... Because I still believe in magic and at Burning Man it still does exist.  And I can wait to share it with my most important people once again.

 

Burning Man Packing List - What You REALLY Need

So I've seen about 4241525456436 packing lists for Burning Man and most of them I feel like are really excessive.   I've edited my list from last year based on my experience and what I plan to take this year along with comments.  I also provided photos where possible.

CLOTHING

• Costumes - I planned all sorts of outfits and then basically wore none of them and just tooled around in shorts, bikini tops, and flowy clothes by day and my animal fleece onesie at night.  The key is flowy and loose.  Jeans, even shorts, are really uncomfortable and remember no logos!  Plus you don't want to do feathers, glitter, etc, because it's MOOP.  Here are example outfits:

• Fleece onesie - CRUCIAL - I cannot explain to you HOW COLD it gets at night.  I don't care if you have the warmest beer jacket ever you will freeze.  I was wearing a thick, full body, animal onesie (pictured below) and if I was standing away from people I was cold. 
• Full WINTER outfit if you don't go onesie.  It can get to FREEZING temps out there so think post ski day - fleece pants, warm jacket, tall wool socks.  Layers are the best so you can add and subtract.

• Boots - CRUCIAL - You would think in the desert you'd be all about the flip flops but honestly I wore flipflops Day One and then my ankle black boots the rest of the time.  Keeps your feet in better condition because they don't dry out and means you avoid stepping on anything unpleasant and protects your feet at night.  Here are the ones I'm wearing this year:

• Socks - CRUCIAL
• Underwear
• Swimsuits - CRUCIAL - just way easier than underwear in a lot of cases.  I just wore swimsuits all day everyday
• Face Mask/Scarf/Handkerchief - I used this face mask last year and it was kind of annoying so I rarely used it.  When I'd breathe in the fabric would go into my mouth which was uncomfortable.  I'd either do a hard mask (like the ones people wearing on planes) or just a small handkerchief that you can just wear around your neck and use when needed.  Even having a face mask I rarely used it.

Vogmask Microfiber High-Filtration Dust Mask

Photo Credit: Amazon.com

• Pasties - if you are going this far just be naked 
• Hat  - I brought one last year and it was annoying and I stopped wearing it after the first day.  If you do bring a hat make sure it is tight on your head or has a tie so it doesn't blow off when you are biking.  Mine kept flying off my head and made me crazy!

TOILETRIES

• Contacts - DAILIES are key.  You do not want to be putting the same contacts back in your eyes.  It is GROSS out there and you are forever unclean.  I also highly recommend carrying a pair on your person at all times.  I missed an awesome burn last year because my contact came out and I was miles from camp and had to go all the way back to get a new pair.
• Kleenex - you get so much dust and crap on your face, hands, up your nose, in your ears, that tissues were key (just don't litter!)
• Hairbrush/Comb - For girls I recommend a comb because it's a little easier to get through the tangles.  If you are camping and there for a week there ain't no showers so your hair is going to be your worst enemy especially if it's long.  I was there 4 days last year and went from clean hair down to dirty hair down to two french braids.
• Chapstick - CRUCIAL - you will dry out like a leaf - I used mine a ton.  Again always have this on you since you never know when you'll be back at camp
• Hair ties
• Sunscreen - CRUCIAL
• Makeup - Honestly you can if you want.  I used a little in full disclosure but you don't need to bring out the big guns
• Toe nail clippers - Sounds random but I did use them
• Deodorant - CRUCIAL
• Bobby pins
• Dry shampoo
• Bandaids
• Tampons - just in case
• Razor - CRUCIAL - look I can camp with the best of them and certainly didn't shave my legs in the four days I was there but there came a time when I HAD to shave my armpits.  TMI sorry but even just that literally act made me feel 10 x cleaner.
• Shampoo and conditioner in 1 - If you have access to an RV it makes sense to bring.  The hippie side of me says NO SHOWERS AT BURNING MAN.  My skin and hair says... I'd do it if I could.
• Shaving cream
• Floss - another thing that will make you feel SO much cleaner just from that one little act
• Toothpaste/Toothbrush
• Lotion - CRUCIAL - the playa dust eats away at the moisture in your skin - my daily routine was baby wipes to get all the dust off me and then lotion.
• Baby Wipes - CRUCIAL - this is the best bath you are getting
• Mouth guard
• Eye drops - CRUCIAL - there's that dust again! 
• Tweezers

ELECTRONICS

• Head Lamp - CRUCIAL - I used this SO much and way easier than a flashlight.  Here's the one I'm bringing: 
• Headphones - There is plenty of music surrounding you.  Be present.
• Phone - There isn't any service but obviously had with me.  I bought one of those water/dirt resistant phone cases but never ended up using my phone especially because that's an expensive thing to lose or break which is highly likely in the craziness of Burning Man.  Instead I suggest bringing a water/dirt resistant CAMERA which I used A TON.
• Aux cable - brought it for the car ride - key
• Camera - Again I recommend a water/dirt resistant camera that isn't too expensive in case you do lose it.  I used mine a ton.  Here's a photo of mine (so meta):
• Batteries - good to have for headlamp, etc.  Only need to bring one extra round.  I'm likely bringing an external power pack this year since I'll be there longer but last year I didn't need a second charge on anything.  
• Phone charger - didn't use it until I got to the hotel after Burning Man but good to have packed
• Kindle for car ride - You'll likely be sleeping or so excited that you can't sleep or driving so you don't really need
• Watch - A throw-away cheap watch is a great thing to have to keep track of when different events occur.  Time can get away from you easily on the playa!
  

OTHER

• Earplugs - CRUCIAL - if you plan to sleep 
• Wallet - Duh
• Paintbrush and paint - My gift last year was body painting.  I'm going to bring paint again this year but am changing up the brand/product.  
• Here's the stuff I used last year which wasn't great (too light and came off easy) 

 Sargent Art 66-5525 Washable Fluorescent Paint

Photo Credit: Amazon.com

• Here's the stuff I'm using this year (much more brilliant and harder to get off):

 UV Glow Blacklight Face and Body Paint

Get it on Amazon here

• Playa Cup - CRUCIAL - One of the most important purchases you will make!  Very important to get one that has a lid and a handle.  The lid prevents dirt from getting into your wet cup when you are biking around (mine last year was undrinkable after day two) and a handle so that you can attach it to your bike, belt, basket, etc, while biking.

Get it at REI here

• Flask - a nice to have separate from your Playa Cup to add extra liquor to drinks at the different camps or for a pull
• Glasses - I used mine a lot when I was tooling around the campsite.  Also if you get an eye infection you are going to need them!
• Sunglasses - CRUCIAL
• EmergencE
• Koozie
• Medicine
• Eye mask - again if you are sensitive to light nice to have for sleeping
• Fanny pack - I use a small one by day to house my chapstick, sunscreen and playa cup

Get it at American Apparel here

• Camelbak or small backpack - CRUCIAL - Once it started getting dark I would switch from fanny pack to Camelbak and pack it like it was an overnight bag - chapstick, sunscreen, glasses, extra contacts, full bladder of water, tissue, toothbrush/paste, etc.  You never know what time you are coming home if you even do.  It makes you feel much safer too because you feel confident that you could get lost in the desert and still survive for a day or two.  And then I'd strap my onesie to the outside (too big to fit inside) and I was ready to go!  Don't get one that is TOO big because you want to be able to dance in it but not so small that you can't fit anything.

Get it at REI here

• Waterproof iPhone case - nice just to keep your iphone in since dust seeps into everything but you never use your phone so possibly pointless
• Goggles - CRUCIAL - you never know when a dust storm is going to hit and it can get a little dusty when a lot of people are biking around you so definitely need goggles.  HOWEVER, I disagree that you need two pairs.  Here's a photo of mine - pink tinted which was plenty easy to see day and night.  You are never going to want to bother with switching them.

Get it on Amazon here

• Pens - Randomly I actually used my pen a lot to write down people's names I met, etc.  Kind of nice to have on you
• Gum - CRUCIAL
• Info Papers - I know Burning Man makes a guide that you can use to find parties, lectures, etc.  I carried it around the first day and then left it at camp.  The best part of Burning Man is discovery... don't plan out your days.
• Cigarette papers
• Freezer ziplock bags - CRUCIAL - the best decision I made was separating out my clothes for each day into ziplock bags and squishing all the air out of them.  It not only made it so I could fit more in my bag but it greatly reduced contamination of my dirty and clean clothes.  I can't stress HOW dirty you get and how good clean clothes feel. 
• Lights/decoration for your bike - be prepared to deck out your bike in some way that makes it yours for day AND night.  There are hundreds of bikes and this will make it easier for you to find yours AND for people to find you/follow you in the dark.
• Lights for your person - same thing as your bike... people are zooming around in the pitch black on their bikes and the last thing you want is for them not to see you.  Plus being all lit up at night is fun!  Just make sure your lights aren't MOOP (glow bracelets that fall off)
• Bug repellent - I didn't need this last year but never hurts to have ESPECIALLY if insects are particularly favorable to your taste!
• Bike lock - I recommend a bike lock that has a key not a combo because I find combos in the dark to be a little rough. However, a key can be lost.  Decide which you prefer but definitely lock your bike when you aren't with it.  Burning Man is a very safe, open place but that doesn't mean people won't snag a free ride!

Memories of Burning Man 2014 - Black Rock City, Nevada

Time has made writing this somewhat less painful, though no less poignant. The sand and wind may have erased the evidence, but the Playa remembers our footsteps and our stories.  This was my first burn and it's taken over a month for my feelings and perspectives to properly soak in so that I could share them with you.  Enjoy it.  Judge it.  But please at least read it.

I had no idea what to expect. Well, I had some idea that I’d conjured up in my head - a desert of campers half naked, half stoned, sharing the earth for a week.  I'd purposely refused to watch the trailers or read more than I had to to come prepared.  What I wasn't expecting was the openness, the acceptance and the placing aside of the real world's bullshit for a week.

Burning Man came at a time in my life when I needed to cleanse my soul. Ironic in a place where the closest thing to a shower is a foam party.  Sure, what you’ve heard is true…some of the best parts were the drinking and partying and dancing until dawn.  It was a shitload of fun.  But it was the people, the music and the creative abandon of this transient place that truly captured me.

 

 

 
Within hours of arrival, I found myself sitting on a couch next to a guy who must have been growing his wildly colored dreads for a decade.  Every surface covered in tattoos and piercings. He was the guy my mom would've told me never to sit by on the subway.  But Burning Man encouraged me to hug that man and hear his story and walk away thinking he was the most interesting man on Earth.

Whether it was this tattooed man, the bartender who raised llamas or the British lawyer dressed in harem pants...everyone had an amazing story and a different reason for being there.  And the care these people put into celebrating what they have and each other was astonishing.  I don’t care what you've heard, 68,000 people living together without significant crime, no form of currency and very little trace of waste is impressive.  Hats off to us, damnit.  Imagine if every person in the world put that much effort into the world we live in the other 51 weeks of the year.  Fuck the world would be great!

Most of my time was spent mesmerized by the imagination of people.  In the real world you run into brilliance and knowledge and intellect a lot, but you run into less and less creativity.  The real world is tired, sold out, and bored.  Burning Man?  Picture Peter Pan's Neverland... But better. Because the grownups haven't forgotten how to believe in fairies and magic; they've turned a scrap of dirt into a real life Neverland where you could board a plane to Pandora, ride inside a giant glowing fish blaring disco music or dance in homage to the rising sun among monkeys, unicorns and purple dragons.

People who talk about Burning Man reference the movie-themed Thunderdome, the orgy camps and the wasteful, rich camper vans that are "ruining the neighborhood."  

People overlook the smaller theme camps where imagination is living and breeding and spreading.  I walked down the street one day wistfully wishing I’d brought more costumes only to be accosted by a leprechaun who asked me to be in a fashion show. Without question I said “yes” (the favored word of Burning Man) and was led into a room filled with crazy clothes to select an outfit and parade it down a handmade runway.  And after that final twirl, I stepped off the runway and continued down the street ecstatic in my new do that was magically mine to keep! 

And then there’s the Playa, where the million dollar art cars and sound camps and Temple get a lot of the love.  And please believe... I loved them too.

 

Open your eyes and ears to the random smattering of art structures that appear out of nowhere or the DJ that took his four-wheel van and turned it into a narwhal that played the best beats I heard all week.  Move over Skrillex; meet DJ Little John.

 

Photo Credit: Matt McConnell

 

 Photo Credit: Matt McConnell

 

Which brings me to my favorite part: the music. As a rabid music connoisseur, I read through the Burning Man booklet of "DJs and bands" that would be playing throughout the week and of hundreds of artists, I recognized one.  Problem?  Hell no! I was so stoked to see what new tracks I’d uncover.

I've often wish for a "soundtrack to my life” and this was the first time I encountered one. From dawn ‘til dusk ‘til dawn again there was music. Drum lines, acoustic guitar, dance, and deep deep house. 

 

 Photo Credit: Matt McConnell

Walk a block; hear something different. And it wasn't just the sound.  It was the feel and visuals of the music…Lasers, lights, smoke and hypnotic soul-soaked bass.  At night, Burning Man became a world of music made physical for us all to share and revel in.  Headphones not included, only music that could be experienced together.

 

 

 

 

The magic hour was near sunrise when the music lured the faithful out to the deep Playa. I’d look around and see nameless faces on bikes cycling silently towards an unseen destination with only music to light the way.  As the sky turned to pink, the music would change its tempo, its volume, its mood and the crescendo would come to pops of champagne and cheers as the sun crested the flat horizon.   Each dark night leading to another dazzling day.  I’d snatch at that moment like a child chasing glow bugs, hoping to capture the feeling and internalize it deep down inside me where I could turn to it and remember long after this fleeting world was gone.

 

 

Some of us came to Burning Man to temporarily run away (I know I did) but I think we can all agree that we found ourselves running TOWARDS something instead - understanding, friendship, love, peace.  At least those are the things I walked away with. An understanding of a world outside of my NYC bubble. Friendship and love for a group of people I’d known for days and will cherish for decades. And an inner peace that I return to on rainy days when work or love or friendship sucks. A peace that reminds me that each day is what I make of it. Whether it's having the balls to make a friend of a subway stranger or be open to love from an unexpected place, I left with my eyes and heart open.  And I count the days until I can cleanse this soul in fire on the sands of the Playa.

 

The media, the rich, and even the original hippies are all responsible for diluting the meaning of Burning Man.  The media portrays it as a pagan sex camp, the rich introduce campers and showers and waste, and the original hippies bitch about “how it used to be.”  I challenge anyone to say that Burning Man is going to shit.  Maybe for you.  But that doesn’t mean that others can’t experience it and feel something about it for themselves.  For those of you who might only experience it through word of mouth or blogs or YouTube, I implore you to ponder these final thoughts before forming an opinion and maybe, just maybe, try it.  I was scared shitless and I'm SO glad I did it.

1. We can be whatever community we want to be; we just have to try.
2. The person you least expect is probably the most interesting one. We all judge. Yes, even you.
3. You never know when and where love and friendship will find you. Leave yourself open to be surprised.
4. Spend less time worried about other people’s motives and bullshit. Focus on your own and leave it all on the table.

I'll end with a special shout-out to the artists, musicians and people that I met throughout my week at Burning Man.  Be sure that you each left your unique mark on me and you won't be forgotten.  From family dinners to clumsy bike rides to early mornings dancing to the music of the Narwhal... "Happy New Year."  I look forward to seeing you all again next burn.

 Photo Credit: Matt McConnell