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Monday, October 12, 2009

Knott's Scary Farm - One of Those

October 1st begins my favorite month of the year culminating in my favorite event of the year, Halloween (after my birthday of course). And nothing starts the month off better than a trip to Knott's Scary Farm...

We left around 7:30pm on Sunday to head down to Buena Park from L.A. We chose to go on a Sunday because there would be less crowds then Friday or Saturday and no traffic. We also have a secret parking spot we park in for free that is just a block away from the park so we knew we wouldn't have to wait in the two hour line to get into the parking lot (Nice try I'm not telling you where it is).

After parking we wandered towards the entrance since we already had printed out our tickets. If you buy four tickets online in advance it's only $25 a ticket instead of the standard $53. The lines went pretty quickly so the four of us got right in.

We started off in Ghost Town because there are three mazes right next to each other including the newly redone "Lockdown," which has a high-security prison theme and "Club Blood," which as the name suggests is a bloody hospital experiment gone wrong. Club Blood featured a very visual section of the maze with mannequins wrapped in saran wrap with tubes up their noses being drained of fluid. So gross. So awesome. Club Blood also featured the disco room complete with bloody goon strippers. Man I love Halloween.

After these two masterpieces we walked back towards the main area of the park right past the line for the movie-inspired "Stepfather" maze. The line wasn't too horrible so we got in it. Usually the movie mazes are the best because they have the most money backing them from the studio. As we were waiting in line a tall blonde and her posse cut in front of us in line. Luckily, I boxed out her friends so she was alone in front of us. I of course had to make a snide comment which she just smiled at because in her mind she has already won. Right up until the point when we walked into the entrance and the guard told her to get in the back of the line. Karma. Is. A. Bitch. Suck it Blondie.

We walked into the first room of the maze only to be attacked by a falling table saw and three goons. After this the next door opened and we shuffled right out into... the main walkway outside. Yeah. That was it. I CAN'T BELIEVE I WAITED IN A LINE FOR TWENTY MINUTES FOR THAT! It was worse than finding out Santa doesn't exist! In a rage I walked along the line letting everyone know it was a huge waste of their time.

Discouraged we bought hotdogs and funnel cake and ventured towards the log ride (our mutual favorite at KSP). The log ride line was long but not unbearable. Just so you aren't confused if you go the log ride is renamed "Pyromaniax" during Halloween because they make the ride scary. While waiting in line we determined that we would all be making very serious faces when we went down the waterfall at the end.

We got on the ride and floated into the darkness. The ride is pretty fast which makes it exciting and it is really dark right in the places where the guys jump out at you. It's totally freaky awesome and I screamed my way all the way through. Here is the result of our "serious" faces...

Infected with a lust for fun rides we walked past the Boomerang, saw another reasonably short line, and decided to ride the rollercoaster. On the Boomerang, you are first lugged up a huge incline and then released causing maximum speed straight downward that then culminates in a sidewinder straight into a full 360 degree loop and then up another steep incline. They release you again and this time you take the loop and the sidewinder going backwards. It is really fast and definitely makes you lose your stomach. Unfortunately, because the ride is set up this way there is only one at a time unlike most rollercoasters which can have two cars going at the same time.

This meant that the "short" line took 1.5 hours to get through. We were MISERABLE. The only entertainment was two ghetto people getting a fight about who got which seat on the coaster. The guy was gigantic, bald and holding a stuffed Elmo. The lady was also huge with pink hair wearing a tiara. It was like watching two bears mate. Awesome. The best part was once they stopped fighting, rather than take her tiara off, the lady pulled out a scarf which she then used to anchor the tiara to her head. Buena Park - What a kick in the pants.

The ride itself was almost worth the wait. It was fast, it was high and I was literally shaking with adrenaline when I got off the ride. From there we headed back to the car because the park had closed at this point only to find that our friend's car had been towed. Poor girl parked in the Walgreen's parking lot. What a night!

Overall, my recommendation is this: Don't go on the rides unless they have something to do with Halloween because otherwise there isn't any point in going to Knott's Scary Farm you should just go to the regular version of the park. Also, find a secret spot.... because you can't have mine. Worth the $25 entry for sure but not worth the 1.5 hour line for Boomerang.

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